Pen Pal Culture Blog

Hello lovelies!

The Internet is a crazy fun place, but it is crazy. So you got to know how to protect yourself from Spam or potentially dangerous people. Keeping this community as safe, as possible has always been my priority.

Emails

Have at least 2 E-Mail accounts. One account is for all your private stuff - it has might have your last name in it and it's an email you might also use for important stuff like a job application. One E-Mail account to sign up for social media - ideally it doesn't have your last name mentioned. The 2nd E-Mail you can also use for your Internet friends and pen pals.

Your Address

In some countries having a post office box, is free. I live in Switzerland so for everyone from here - guy's it's free. So giving out a P.O Box address is safer for obvious reasons, as it's not your home address. So I suggest getting one if you can but it's not a must of course. Before giving out your home address you can also agree on being Internet friends first for a while, or just having a quick video call to make sure - the person seems trustworthy of your address. I think as for having international pen pals giving out an address isn't as risky, as online dating - where people are actually living in your area. Even though this is not a platform for online dating, I still wanted to give this advice here. When you decide to online date and meet up, make sure it's in a public place. Don't tell them where you live before you have really got to know them. Always tell a friend or a family member where you are going and who you are meeting. 2 of my closest friends and my mom can always locate the location of my phone, just in case. You can also set the settings on some apps for like 8 hours or something. Better safe than sorry :)!

Requests - Filter

Don't accept every "Hi wanna be friends." This advice is not only to keep you safe, it also helps you to filter out people who might only text you for 2 days. Trustworthy requests - write to you personally You can tell by their request that they read your pen pal ad. They will tell you a little about themselves, age, where they are from, etc. I have two examples below of requests you can trash and ones you can consider if you are interested. It's up to everyone to decide if you choose to reply to people you aren't interested in or to people who seem creepy. But to avoid to get insulted just don't reply to the ones who think are creepy or only write "Hi..." I think it's nice if you take the time to reply someone who took the time to send you a long personal request but you simply already had enough requests that you think you can't take an other, than I think it's okay to reply to them. Meeting Up

Pretty much the same as I said about online dating. Make sure to videochat before you meet. Tell your friends, family who you are meeting and where (somewhere public is best). Normally I make sure to also take a friend with me, haha so you also have someone to film your emotional meet up. Just in case you met your internet friend on one of my blogs, make sure to feel free to always spam me with tons of photos and videos, I LOOVE seeing them.

Information you shouldn't share - which I hope is obvious but I need to still talk about it

Unless you want to compare how crazy the salary difference between babysitting in the US or in Europe is, don't share how much you earn. Get really suspicious please if your internet friend asks for money. People have really creative and crazy ideas to convince you they need your help and money. Don't do it - you will regret it. So keep all your bank data to yourself, how much you earn, how much your friends or family earns. Also remember you are allowed to not answer all the questions somebody asks. Some people ask really strange questions out of the blue, and you have every right to not answer them or be irritated- examples I have read: "What shampoo do you use?" - "Where do you or do you not shave?". Unless you have been talking about how great your hair has been feeling lately for what ever reason, it's strange and I hope you can detect when something just seems off.

Report people

Please report people who aren't following the rules - not just block them. So platforms like facebook, instagram, etc take action to these accounts. Also report users here if someone is causing trouble.

Did I forget something important or do you still have questions? Comment down below or contact me :)!

xoxo Cara Giulia

Hello lovelies!

A few people asked me to make a post about this - so here it is. "How to from a good friendship online." A quick reminder: finding your "best" friend is as hard in real life, it's not any easier online. You might go to school or work with 20 other people, sometimes you quickly find a best friend there or you don't. Same goes for online friends. Be patient. But here are my tips:

1. Be understanding, if your pen pal has anxiety or some ridiculous fear, be understanding and supportive. Make them feel like they can tell you anything.

2. Use humor, make fun of yourself. I love making fun of myself in emails and it often turns out that my internet friends then feels comfortable to make fun of herself to and when we tend to be similar personalities we basically start making jokes about "us". And that's a nice bonding, I also do with my real life friends.

3. Try to connect over more then one social media. But talk on one specific one regularly.

4. Have unique conversations. Ask things nobody else asks. Introduce your home town, home country... And they do the same. Tell them childhood story you probably almost forgot about or the crazy dream you had last night. These are just a few tips, feel free to comment some of your own tips below.

xoxo Cara Giulia